Men, as in our species of homo sapiens, are clueless.
Clueless about what, you ask? Well, clueless about how to do everything well.
Have you ever wondered that how that person, the one who is pretty, has everything together? And has had it together since you have known her? What does she eat for breakfast? And how the heck does she manage her family and her job, while finding time to post about her workouts and take vacation every other week?
We all have been there. Comparing ourselves to someone else. And realizing that we are clueless about how to do as well as them.
When a stressful time comes in our life, we try to rip our hair off and mutter to ourselves about our ‘cluelessness’ when it comes to getting out of that panic condition. It is during these times when panic and anxiety hit the closest. Everyone else has it together, why not me?
That girl doesn’t have her parents with her anymore and she is still doing better.
My coworker has three more children than me and he still manages to eat well and workout.
The neighbour was in a car crash and he has no fear but I still panic at the thought of leaving the house.
Cluelessness leads to comparison. Comparison, they say, is the thief of joy. In fact, comparison is akin to adding fuel to the fire of anxiety.
It’s okay (trust me) to not be a black belt in everything. All the others who we think have it together are just as clueless as us. There is nobody without anxiety, just the intensity varies. It seems they have a black belt, but in reality, their belt only looks black and that too, only to others. You ask them, it will be a different story, um colour.
More and more, it seems to me that we need to accept ourselves, warts and all. Anxious behaviour may have become a part of who we are, it won’t always be there but we don’t have to compare ourselves and then resent ourselves for that. Radical acceptance of our self is the only way we can accept ‘clueless’ behaviour and still live to tell the tale.